Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Grandpa

It's been almost six months since I took the time to write a post here and I guess that's because it has been a very busy stressful yet somewhat happy time. As you know I was in UK from 11th June until July 7th just in time to pick up the keys to our newest rental place. Two days later I celebrated my 70th birthday with my lovely extended family.  Then the packing and moving began. We had until the 31st of July to be out. The overlap made the move slightly less difficult. Since the new place was just 2 blocks from the old I could literally just pack contents of one closet and hang it into the new one. While it was a simple idea the execution was not that easy. In both homes the closets were on the upper level so I had plenty of trips up and down stairs. Buddy gave me a hand. So did a friend of my daughter. The major packing and moving was to be done by a hired firm on July 25. Before the movers' arrival I had hired a declutter person to help me get rid of much unneeded stuff that had gathered. Though I tried hard to find good movers they were not well organized and it took them 2 days to relocate the kitchen and dining room dishes and contents  along with the big furniture pieces. I must mention that a family friend with a pick up came to assist me  and ended uo helping the movers. He came for a 3rd day to pick up what movers left behind. What I true friend!
Luckily I had signed a contract for the move and was only charged an additional 10% of the agreed cost.  My friend who helped was offered a job by the movers
but he has a more serious role to play. He is a very special caregiver. I shall post it in the new year.
So by July 28 we were in our new location with many boxes left to unpack to get our house to a homey state again. I had the entire month of August to plod away at boxes. Buddy and I would go out for a well deserved lunch now and then just to get out. Daughter helped put up some venetian style blinds we bought for the main floor since the place came with rag like old drapes that we boxed and put in the basement. We preferred our own fresh new window dressings. The bedrooms got nice blackout drapes.
My goal was to have both the inside and the garden looking better. Jen a gardener who helped us each summer was willing to follow us to our new location. She's a real gem.
On September 5 we were off to the UK so Buddy and Grandpa could enjoy the new baby. It was during the move and the trip to UK that it became very clear that hubby was now a vey different person. He had been trying to hide his memory loss for a while but a noticeable big change in behaviour was cropping up. He began to buy expensive items claiming they would be useful if we had an upcoming depression.
He would wander away in tourist areas leaving us wondering. He would refuse to use his new iPhone saying he did not feel making or answering calls mattered. All conversations have become more difficult as it seems he no longer is able to follow a long conversation readily and his frustration leads to outbursts of anger.
Once  back home from UK I booked a trip just for two. It would be easier and more relaxing without hubby to worry about. So at the end of October Buddy and I took a break and visited his favourite island, CaypCoco, since we had missed our lovely summer to our relocation. The move had been unexpectedly imposed on us when the  landlord decided to sell that place to her brother in law.
During November we shopped and prepared gifts for Christmas. At the end of the month we took another seven day trip. We knew on December 10th our kids would be here from UK. We also knew that our way of life would soon be very different. We just have no idea how it will be because hubby must soon stop going to his office and that will make him very upset. In fact it might happen that he may not know how to get there or how to get home soon. He has had moments of confusion while travelling in our area. i have tried to keep rental homes  near his office because signs of dementia have be there for a while.
When that time comes I shall be responsible for a different type of disabled adult as long as I am able. He is a grandpa now but he has trouble recalling her name at times. Buddy is there to guide him. His recall is fantastic.
Grandpa loves his little gal who is almost six months old. He is seated in the living room of the home I created pretty much without his help this time. But Buddy was there for me.
Grandpa is loved.

PS This post has errors in paragraph placement due to blogger glitches.

10 comments:

  1. You have certainly had your hands full, and it continues. I hope help is a prospect for the near future.

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  2. Thanks for the informative post. Now I know where you have been, and it's been a very busy time. I'm hoping that you will have a chance to relax and perhaps figure out what to do with hubby. My heart goes out to you, dear one.

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  3. Here's to wonderful memories...

    May your new year be blessed!

    I had to look up Caypcoco. Woud you believe I'd never heard of it? Beautiful!

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  4. Wow you've really had quite the year (end). I'm so glad though that you are now relocated since you've found out your hubby is losing his memory. I'm hoping and praying all the best for all of you and hope you can get him the help he needs so he can be well cared for 24/7.

    Congratulations on your newest family member. I'm grateful too that you have such wonderful friends who have helped with both the move and the garden. Big hugs and the very best in the New Year. xx

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  5. I am so sorry to hear about your husband and you have really had a stressful year. Prayers for a better 2017 and for finding ways to deal with what is surely coming. it is a blessing Buddy can help you with your husband, two will make it easier than just one. this disease is just sad and mind boggling. I am happy for you that you were able to take time off with Buddy and that you got to visit your new grand baby

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  6. So nice to see you again! Happy New Year!
    My, you do have a lot on your plate! I seriously wouldn't make it if I had to move now. You have been busy!

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  7. happy birthday .hope new place stays wonderful for you .having new grand kids make life exciting .
    wishing you a happy new year

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  8. Thank you for the catching up. Your life has certainly been full in these last months. I'm sorry to hear about your hubby. That's a very difficult road to travel. Sending you love and light in my prayers.

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  9. What a busy year you've had. Moving is the pits - and with disorganized movers - just makes things worse! But you did have a good friend to help.

    Life is strange - your dear hubby losing his memory and Buddy right in there with "fantastic recall". Oh they will help each other!

    The road will not be easy, but you are very strong in spirit and I know you will find happiness and moments of peace with your family.

    Congrats on your birthday - and the new grandchild! They keep us young and grounded!
    Lots of love and hugs,

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  10. Dear Heidrun, this posting from last year reflects some of what you have shared with me in e-mails. I'm wondering if your's husband's dementia is progressing slowly or more quickly and what help, beyond Buddy, that you have. Please be good to yourself while you are being good to others. Peace.

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